What Not To Do When You Are A New Mom: 10 Things

6 min read

What not to do when you are a new mom

1. Worrying too much

If you are a new mom, there are a lot of things that you would worry about. Stuff like why your baby keeps crying, whether your baby gets enough sleep, what diapers to use, whether it is okay to bathe your little one, and the list goes on. As a new parent, choose to live in the moment and treasure the beautiful; times with your tiny bundle of joy.

 

Do not be a supermom
2. Do not be a supermom

We understand that moms do most of the work around the house, running errands and taking care of a newborn/kids, cooking, etc.; that is why we are labeled supermoms however, we cannot be the one who always saves the day, we need to take a break and regain our strength too. Do not think you can do everything all the time as this will exhaust you. It is essential to find your crew or ask for help. Call your friends who can do anything for you and vice versa. Ask your spouse for support. Take a breather. Your health mentally and physically should be at its best, so you can effectively fulfill your mommy duties. Your baby needs a present, well-grounded, self-aware, healthy mama who can shower her with love and cuddles.


3. Do not be a perfectionist

Being a new mom will give you new experiences and allow you to commit natural mistakes. You will learn many things along the way as your baby grows. There is no such thing as a perfect mom; we are just human like everybody else and what matters is we learn from our wrongs. It's totally fine if the room is messy, if your baby doesn't know how to sit yet at six months, or if you are always wearing sweaters and yoga pants. Do not be hard on yourself for trying to make things perfect. Everything will be okay, and you will still be a good mom no matter what.

 

 

Do not dwell on negativity
4. Do not dwell on the negativity

Let's admit it. Caring for a newborn feels rewarding, but it is definitely not easy. There will be many ups and downs along the way, and challenges can always be present. If you are in a new situation and are unsure how to handle it, do the best you can to resolve or accept it. Do not dwell too much on your mistakes; instead, celebrate your wins of the day, big or small. This can help you be motivated and stay on track in performing your duties as a mom. Having a baby can be difficult, but always remember to look on the bright side. They will not be forever babies. We must put much effort and patience and nurture them with unconditional love as they grow.


5. Do not ignore your mom gut

Experts say that mothers can be more sensitive to particular cues, which we call "mom's intuition." Also known as gut feeling, it is the ability to make decisions without analytical reasoning. However, most people mistake intuition for anxiety. There is a difference between the two; intuition is a natural gift of nature that can only be accessed in a place of calm awareness. It lets us feel that something is wrong, and we naturally protect our baby's safety and welfare. But sometimes, intuition becomes an instinct when fear is in the picture, and we know that instincts are not always right. Anxiety has a high emotional charge compared to intuition which is a natural feeling, and fear is triggered by what others think or would say you should do.

How to know when to trust your mom intuition? Our intuition drowns when it is overshadowed by fear. As a new mom, there will be a lot of unsolicited advice from friends and family. We are getting confused and trying to consider everyone's opinion on caring for a newborn. There is nothing wrong with listening to their advice as long as you will not lose your voice in addressing matters. Strengthen your mom gut by practicing self-awareness and being more grounded. You know your child more and what is best for them. If you can remove fear or anxiety as the basis of a particular intuition, then you should trust your mom gut.



6. Do not trust unreliable sources

There are instances where you will be given unsolicited advice from friends and family. There is nothing wrong with listening to them; we know that they mean well. Make sure it is aligned with what you think is best for your baby. Anybody can easily search the Internet for answers, and anybody can suddenly be an expert. You can google things you need to know, for instance, how to treat your baby's gas or soothe them from colic, etc. There are many websites that can give you different information. Make sure to only trust reliable sources like the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), WHO (World Health Organization), AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics), and the like. Just a few trusted websites are okay to know the correct information. Learning from different sources can sometimes be overwhelming, confusing, and sometimes can be unreliable.

 

 

Do not ignore intimacy
7. Do not neglect intimacy

Without a doubt, your baby will be the center of everyone's attention at home. It is natural for us to dedicate ourselves and shower our babies with love and care. Although the baby makes us busy and takes most of our hours, ensure that you and your partner have time for yourselves. Spending time with each other helps build a strong bond and connection, which makes you two a good team in raising a family.


8. Do not hesitate to seek professional help

Having a baby is a mix of excitement, being overwhelmed, and anxiety. It may be a whole lot of powerful emotions at the same time. Sometimes these emotions can be uncontrollable that may lead to something that we don't expect - depression. Most moms experience what we call "baby blues," which can show 2-3 days after giving birth and may last for two weeks. Its symptoms are a combination of mood swings, appetite problems, sadness, anxiety, inability to sleep or focus, crying, and irritability. Baby blues are common in new moms and eventually resolve on their own after a couple of weeks.

However, some moms experience the symptoms for more than two weeks, which can be considered postpartum depression. People should understand that postpartum depression is sometimes a complication of giving birth and is never a person's flaw or weakness. Its cause can be physical changes after giving birth, sudden hormone drops, etc. It can also be emotional causes if the mother is facing many difficulties and personal problems, plus experiencing exhaustion and being overwhelmed.

The symptoms of depression are more severe than baby blues. It includes extreme mood swings, excessive crying, distancing from people, loss of appetite, hopelessness, anxiety, insomnia or sleeping too much, restlessness, inability to focus or make decisions, panic attacks, self-harm, or hurting the baby or suicide. If you are experiencing these symptoms, do not be reluctant or embarrassed to talk to a doctor. Your child and your safety should be your main priority.

Afraid of saying No
9. Afraid of saying no

Being a rookie mom, people looked at us as inexperienced when it came to caring for our babies. Mostly our family, like our mom, aunt, and mother-in-law, would like to pitch in to take care of our kid. Being a new mom is the best thing to happen in our lives, and we want to experience everything that comes with it. If you feel that you are not ready for other family members to visit, assist, or give you unsolicited advice. It is okay to say no. Sometimes we say yes to things that we do not agree on just to avoid conflict, disagreement, etc. It is also not in our nature to disappoint a friend or a family member and hurt their feelings. But you have to think about how you feel, mama, think if the situation is the best for you and your baby if you are not ready yet for them to visit or assist you, and you want to spend your time with your newborn alone, then let them know they can pay a visit when you are ready.

 

 

10. Do not take your health for granted

You may be busy on the loop, and your blood may be running on caffeine due to lack of sleep, it is important that you take nutritious foods to keep you healthy. You cannot afford to be sick now as your little babe depends on you. Eat more natural foods like veggies and fruits, lots of water, fish, and meat, and avoid processed foods too. Do also some light exercises if you can. If you are a nursing mom, see what not to eat while breastfeeding. Heath is truly your wealth when it comes to raising a family.

 

 

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